I should buck up

Working seems to be very meaningless to me currently, all because of pay cut. I know i shouldn't be feeling this way as it bring down my moral.
I should adjust myself, adjust everything of my life back to how it use to be. It's very difficult, too difficult till i cannot breathe.

Another thing is, I don't wish to be drag into alot of things that doesn't concern me, i feel very terrible being sandwitch, i am trying my very best to be a good friend, a soul mate. Lately, i realise i should not have done alot of things out of good will because everything doesn't concern me and yet all the blames are push to me.
I should learnt to be fair to myself.
I really hope everything just gonna be really over and i want peace back.

I am having some problems, i tried to seek advise from April and Judy, they have been really good to hear me out. At the end of the day, i know i am the only person who can save myself. I WANT TO GET OUT OF IT!